Why was this post, of all the posts I have made from the blogs I have written since 2005, the hardest to write and to publish? What is the disease of self-loathing, of self-destruction that clouds my soul, even after six or seven years of my awareness of its existence, fighting it… the fear to stand up for the existence of myself and my ancestors, and the other members of my race, who are threatened in their identity, in their very existence, by the powers which sweep our world toward destruction? For I fear that if we go, the whole world will go with us. What is this shame which has been imbued in us, which has been thrust upon no other people? For if I were Black, or Asian, or a member of any other people of this earth, who felt my people to be facing extinction, would I hesitate for even a second to stand up and shout “No!” But because of who I am, with the disease which has been thrust upon me, it is so difficult to do! And even to tell the story of my attendance at this conference, to which I went, not as a committed member of any group, but as an outsider, an explorer, to see if it was indeed for me – and even in some ways finding that it wasn’t, yet feeling the need to support these people in what they do, and even the need to do more – why so hard? What is the pain in simple honesty? Why the fear? And I feel that it is in some way for these very reasons that I need to publish. Yet it would be so much easier in so many ways not to confront the darkness of this world – to hope that they continue to imagine that I still sleep….
We live in a world run by evil, I think most of us know that. Some of us have varying explanations of why that is. I myself have a perfectly good metaphysical explanation for it, but this is not the place for that. But most of us are aware even if somewhat unconsciously, that our lives have become, for the most part, slavery. We no longer own our own resources, our land, our homes or even our bodies. The structure of society that our ancestors built has been taken away from us, the value we produce by our labor used to produce luxuries for a master class from which we are excluded, except to the effect that its most superficial playthings are allowed to trickle down to us, to help maintain the illusion that we profit from our work.
Western society, the once-dominant civilization of the world as we know it, seems to have been the product of a people who emerged from the last ice age to wrest control of a land slowly becoming temperate and supportive of their will to survive, and once that survival was made more likely by their hardiness, to flourish. Where the blood in these people’s veins, the special light that illuminated their souls came from – the source of the spark that over the next ten thousand years or more allowed them to create not only a great material civilization but a great art and a great culture which expressed and fulfilled their need for more than material existence – is also subject to debate. But they were our ancestors.
Most of the ancestors of the readers of this article came from Europe. There were other civilizations built in other parts of the world, some of which are lost and unknown to us now. We know of one that flourished in China. There appears to have been one in India, even prior to the influx of our own ancestors. And in South America. We know also that there were great civilizations that flourished and perished long before our own ancestors emerged from behind the ice flows to become the creators of this civilization, but those are lost to us, except to the unknown or unknowable degrees to which parts of their culture have survived in our myths and legends, That should not lead us to denegrate the accomplishment of our own ancestors, or the culture they built.
Our ancestors made some mistakes. Some of these were made because they were and always will be inevitable. Some of them were the results of a trickery by a parallel line of development, which I will not call civilization, because its only function is rather parasitic upon civilization, since it produces nothing. One of these, which did not originate in our civilization but was common all over the world at one time, and which tended to drop away as culture developed, was slavery. Slavery is still common in many parts of the world; it was first superseded, acknowledged and evil and banned, in the societies which our ancestors formed, known in the context of the world’s races as the White countries. During the pioneer days of the colonization of the Americas by Europeans, it occurred to some mercantile interest in Africa and the Middle East, that there were no laws banning slavery in the Americas. At this time dominant tribes were still enslaving less fortunate peoples in Africa, and these dominant tribes found that there was a class of Semitic merchants operating in northern and western Africa and the mediterranean who would buy these slaves and market them to White European pioneers in the Americas who were in need for extra labor to help them cultivate the vast and relatively untapped resources of their new continent.
Thus was born the tragic institution of American slavery. By the nineteenth century, due to an unevenness of economic development in the emerging United States related to difference of culture, climate and resources, slavery had become economically unfeasible in the new industrial culture of the northeast. At this point some of the same mercantile and predatory interests who had market the slaves in America in the first place, were trying to replace the Constitutional democratic republic which had been established in the prior century with a centralized federal government which would be controlled by the emerging central banking system which had emerged in Europe. The prevention of this usurpation had been the life’s work of President Andrew Jackson. To accomplish this, they had to conquer and control the States which were still governed by the traditional societies still dominant in the South. The issue of slavery was one to which they were able to tie their own cause by illusion, since slavery had long since been banned in Europe, both by economic and “religious” forces, as in most of the American northeast. They used it in their propaganda to keep Europe from recognizing and coming to the aid of the South, and thus to maintain the blockade and the economic superiority which ultimately enabled them to overcome the superior fighting spirit of the South to establish the American Empire.
Slavery had been a bad thing for the White race and for America, brought about by the greed of those who promoted it, the ignorance of the White plantation owners who indulged in and supported it, and the readiness of the Africans to conquer and sell the next tribe over, for a little profit. During the several centuries in which American slavery flourished, a large population of Black Africans came to exist in America, numbering by the time of what is called the Civil War, about twenty-five percent of the population. This population had largely been stripped, by all those same combined forces of evil and ignorance, of its own various cultures, and left with the most minimal culture of their slave masters, taught for the most part only what they needed to know to keep them functional. They were taught a foreign language, culture and religion, but they were not brought to parity with the dominant culture. During the War which was allegedly fought for their freedom, little thought was given by their supposed rescuers as to what to do with the after the War (since the War was not really about them at all). Lincoln himself thought that they could not be allowed to continue in America and considered sending them all to Madagascar, although clearer heads demonstrated that this was not feasible.
After the War, those same forces that had overthrown the democratic republic in favor of Empire, made use of the recently freed slaves, who had no real plan of their own, to continue to revolutionize, as a precursor of the destruction of society which would be undertaken in the twentieth century by the Bolsheviks in Russia and the Red Chinese, and destroy the culture of the American South, which was the surviving culture of the original Americans. Long after the Southern culture had been brought to its knees, and the lives of the descendants of the slaves brought up to a level far beyond anything enjoyed by their ancestors or their distant cousins still in Africa, the lash of the legacy of slavery was still used on the backs of their former masters. Into the somewhat homogenous culture of the South, seen as a petri dish and example of all of American and European culture, had been introduced a foreign population, which was to be used by the economic masters of the Empire, the masters of usury capital centered in the central banks run by a few mostly Jewish families, dominated by the Rothschilds, as a weapon against the former dominant culture.
The term “racism” was invented by Leon Trotsky in the early twentieth century as a tool of Marxist revolution. It was used to describe and stigmatize the natural resistance of a dominant and racially homogenous society to attempts to protect itself from unhealthy foreign influences. Where there was coexistence, it promoted discord. This concept was created not for the benefit of the supposed victims of racism, but for benefit of those who sought to destroy the structure of an existing culture, to exploit its weakness and pick its bones.
In modern Western society, the natural empathy and uniquely pathological self-abnegation of the White race was exploited first by the banker and federalists and then by the Marxist and their successors the Cultural Marxists to somehow link the guilt and obligation felt, to some extent deservedly, toward the benefit of the descendants of African slaves, to any and all foreign elements, member of totally different, even extremely antithetical races and cultures who might be brought into or run parallel to Western society, to destroy its surviving internal structures to allow its resources to be leached out to benefit the parasites. That structure is further under attack by continuing forces of cultural revolution which turn members of the dominant society again itself – i.e. feminism, gay rights and even phantom epiphenomena like transgenderism. In reaction to all this, some members of the society, mostly Whites who are on the receiving end of the multicultural offensive, have banded together in more and less productive ways to combat it and attempt to maintain the surviving integrity of their society and culture – and hopefully ultimately to overthrow the destructive forces and restablish a more natural order.
American Renaissance was founded in about 1990 by Jared Taylor and is one of the oldest surviving and continuing, rather loose organizations championing White rights and the survival of white culture, and in this age when the tables have turned and the worldwide genocide of the White race has become imminent. No cause has been so vilified in the last few generations, especially since the 1950’s, as the survival of the White race and White culture. Its proponents have been tagged with epithets like White Supremacists, though to whom that refers is unclear, since I have never met or encountered, except perhaps in extremely fictionalized online personalities, any Whites who truly wanted to dominated other races or re-establish slavery. The people I have met merely want their culture to survive and flourish – and for the cultures of other peoples to be allowed to survive and flourish, each in their own way.
There are several organizations, including the newly established National Policy Institute, which have flourished recently. In 2015, with America continuing to be invaded from Mexico, and Europe from the Middle East and Africa (though crossovers between these phenomena abound), and the Trump phenomena, whatever that turns out to be, interest and membership have swelled. It was 2016 Amren conference which was to occur near me which presented itself most readily to my examination.
I went to Amren – the American Renaissance Conference – 2016 (Friday through Sunday, May 20 -22), with few expectations and left with no real conclusions, but it was an interesting and worthwhile experience which left me with more questions than answers. It’s a gathering of speakers, attendees and subculture celebrities whose cultures and intentions are, I think, more diverse than they appear to be. With cultural annihilation on the quickly nearing horizon for the White race in America and Europe – and everywhere else – does this gathering which has been meeting on a more or less annual basis since 1994 gain or lose significance? I have no answer, just thoughts and observations.
For myself, the question is also, does this kind of political activity make any sense? I am reminded by Henrik Palmgren’s narrative of the shift of focus of his Red Ice Creations (now RedIce.TV) over ten years, of my own growing perceived need to participate in political action of some kind. I won’t regurgitate here the tale of my own growing awareness since about 2009, as it’s been fully detailed in earlier editions of this blog and especially in the Ratzaz Diaries. But in my quest to discover who I am and what my part in this world may be (which is unfortunately occurring at a relatively advanced age), I have been compelled to explore both the external, political, and internal, mystical realms. Apparently unlike many who are concerned over the fate of the world in this Age of Lead, I find that I cannot be concerned merely with the political. I feel that I have no choice but to chase the manifestations of evil which plague us to their root causes, and that is where I feel I differ from most of what I saw at Amren.
I’d thought about going to Amren for years, but after conferring with someone in the newly existent “Alt Right” movement back in January, I committed to attend, for many of the same reasons that I threw in my lot with the Asatru Folk Assembly’s Ostara in the South early last month. The difference of course being that I had been an AFA member since 2009, and had no connections at AmRen; and indeed I knew no one else at this conference, except Henrik and Lana from Red Ice, whom I knew would be very busy. And I’ve never been a fan of cocktail party schmoozing, especially in these years of not drinking, which is what a lot of the networking and hanging out at Amren is about.
I did make an effort to speak with some random people, dinner companions and table mates during the speakers, and found about what I had expected: a mixed bag of old and new attendees (especially the latter, as the past year’s crises and the explosion of the Alt Right produced a record attendance). And I was disappointed in that I found no one really like me there; they may have been there, but dressed in sports coats and mixing on a superficial level, it was impossible to sort them out from the old time paleoconservatives and the new Fashy haircuts. For example, I struck up a conversation with a gentleman in his late thirties(?) with a Thor’s hammer hanging out over his tie and was immediately met with a rapid backpedalling in terms of Asatru and a defense of Christianity. I encountered no avowed National Socialists, no Esoteric Hitlerists, no extremes of any kind. I was disappointed in my quest for some sort of outrage, which was both comforting and disappointing, I think. For in some ways I think I simultaneouly craved and feared that edge.
In fact my opinion after the first night, which was basically an opening announcement and a lot of mingling, was that I had stumbled into a gathering of people who were trying to treat the symptoms of a disease without properly diagnosing it first. That is, they were alarmed by the influx of “immigrants” into America and Europe, and by apparent White Genocide all over the world, but found no other way to combat it rather than addressing other Whites. As if millions of Muslims spontaneously decided to march into Europe of their own accord, and Mexicans into the US; the attendees can see that their political leaders have betrayed them, and that the “elites” who run the banks and multinational corporations are exploiting our societies for their own ends and destroying them in the process – but they blame this either on no one in particular or on some failing in the Whites themselves.
I fear that a majority of the attendees at AmRen don’t see that what is going on is at the bottom an occult war of which current world events are the manifestation and culmination. And as someone who feels a deep and intrinsic need to get at and address the root causes of things, I find that unsatisfying, unsettling and disturbing.
The speakers were also a mixed lot, but were for the most part more rewarding. Jared Taylor himself, the founder of Amren and leader of the conference, has provided most of the target for attack on Amren from the “right”, mostly based on his insistent refusal to acknowledge or address what the far right (and I use these political terms with some hesitation – they should all be in quotation marks) calls the Jewish problem. When confronted, he states that while some elite Jews have certainly caused problems in the world, he sees Jews as White and welcomes their participation in Amren and at the conference. The Alt Right itself seems to be all over the map on this issue, and is the main basis for their ridicule by sites like Renegade Tribune and their opposition by many of Henrik and Lana’s guests. Is this occlusion of vision on Taylor’s part intentional, or not? It leads Craig at Renegade to conclude that Taylor is a shill for the Jews and if I read him correctly, to imply that Amren is at its heart all part of the shell game whereby the Jews manipulate the awakening Whites into meaningless opposition to false enemies while the corruption proceeds unabated.
The Jewish question dogs Amren. David Duke was expelled from Amren for trying to get them to confront it. No speaker at this one addressed it, except Taylor himself in response to an audience quesiton. Food for thought.
But many of these speakers are very understandably busy putting out fires in their homes. It was the foreign speakers I found the most compelling, until the end. Two Flemish members of the Vlaams Belang spoke, Filip de Winter and Anke Van dermeersch (the latter’s appearance being scheduled for the final morning, possibly based more on her striking appearance than her speaking ability in English, although her cause is admirable) and provided striking evidence of how Europeans are being driven out of power and existence in their own countries. Dan Roodt reminded us of the ongoing tragedy in South Africa. The speaker from whom I gathered the most new awareness and information was Fernando Cortes, Mexican identitarian; I have to admit I have not thought much of what the “elites” have done to the Mexicans themselves in driving them to invade America. It was eye-opening. The most inspiring and dynamic speaker may have been Ruuben Kaalep, the young Estonian who spoke in somewhat broken but inspiring English with the energy of a Jonathan Bowden.
I think my overrall impression of the conference was moved most positively by the closing remarks of Sam Dickson, apparently addressing his fourteenth Amren, so that I would think his point of view might be a good summary of the overall Amren position, yet I found it to be more than that, enlightening and refreshing. His position, to paraphrase, was that “we” were not Conservatives, nor Liberal; not strict Constitutionalists (a document which he criticized as pretty good for its time, though blind on the issue of race), nor Libertarians. His position then, was strict racialism -making him admittedly, proudly and unabashedly, to use Trotsky’s term which has entered popular discourse as if it were a real noun, a racist. Others might see themselves as White Identitarians, I think, without going too far from his meaning. This is as opposed to the various Nationalist Identitarians who had spoken, and whom I think would have shared his view to greater and lesser extents. Kaalep, for example, made sure that we understood that although the Estonian and Lithuanian identitarians, or nationalists, were able to put aside their differences to confront the common foe of the Muslim invaders, those differences were substantial, deep and long-standing. Indeed it was interesting to note that the Western Europeans, as exemplified by the Flemish Belgians, whose controlling powers have been much more open to the “multicultural” invasion, were more likely to identify as Whites or as Europeans that the Eastern Europeans, whose cultures have been more resistant, and who tended to identify more as nationalist of their countries. Which phenomenon I think adds a cautionary note that Dickson and the advocates of White Nationalism in general may be presupposing an identity that is not as natural to most of us as our national identities, though I suspect this is far less true for the Americans than for the Europeans, with their more authentic and older cultures.
All of which calls into the question that form in, and the identity from which, we should be confronting these assaults on our existence, as there is no doubt of the assaults themselves. Is what is happening specifically an assault on the White race, or is on the ethnic and natural identities of all peoples? As Cortes made clear, the Mexican people are also under assault. He made it clear that Mexico, with its weaker economy, was an easier target than the US for the multinationals, whose goal is to keep Mexican wages low, and as important consequence drive Mexicans over the border into America to look for work, with the resultant consequences from that influx to our own wages and economy. Likewise, while Islam does seem to be a vicious culture, who is driving them into Europe? They have invaded before of course, several times in the last fourteen hundred years, but never before by marching in openly and unchallenged by traitorous governments which hold their own people at bay. I think it is clear from my own experience that race relations in the US are currently subject to similar manipulation and aggravation.
The longer I try to let my impressions of Amren 2016 sort themselves, I find that although I greatly empathize – and more than that, myself feel directly – the pain of the impacted speakers and participants, I don’t share their hope for a political solution to the ongoing and real problem of White Genocide. That is, although of course as a member of the White race, I am quite disinclined to see my race disappear from the planet, I also realize that there is an even larger process occurring.
I am of course a member of the White race and a descendant of Europeans and European Americans, but I am not blind to the fact that my people have suffered degeneration, in the age of degeneration, as much as any. And although I see my mostly nameless ancestors as noble in their accomplishments, I realize that their present descendants, myself included, could in many ways never replicate their accomplishments. I do not understand how the machines my ancestors invented work. I am not capable, personally, of great art. I don’t have the survival skills of my grandfather, or even my father.
I’ve always said, if you want to debunk a “White Supremacist”, if in fact there is such a creature, let me take him with me to WalMart at 7 a.m. on a Saturday morning, and view those creatures that one encounters, who are indeed White but in no sense supreme. We are indeed dwarves who stand on the shoulders of giants.
Indeed, what I would most hate to see extinguished is not the White race as a whole, but that special spark which I feel is divine, which I found in myself after years of spiritual practice. And what I feel opposes it, seeks to snuff it out, is not an acausal loss of awareness on the part of the Whites themselves, but the deliberate and ancient manipulation of a timeless enemy. So that no “isms”, no revisions of government structures, no political philosophies can address the occult conflict of God vs Demiurge that comes to a head, here in our time.
And when I can pull myself away from the emotional rhetoric, I see that it is Waking indeed that is needed – but that though I myself have been Awakened through some process which must have been destiny and the plan of an entity much greater than myself, I am not capable of causing it to occur in others. So that while I may sympathize and support where I may, there is little I can do. And from that perspective, what is the good of an event like Amren?
The question is unresolved. It is clear, I think, that preaching to the choir, while necessary for self-encouragement and providing evidence and a message to the World that those awakening are not alone, is not sufficient. But I think it is clear that events like Amren do no harm, and vilification by their detractors, and worse – for I haven’t discussed the death threats, and this piece is too long already – help to point out why in fact they are necessary. As to the problems that Amren seeks to address, whether those problems can be solved at all, and if so how, is still anyone’s guess. I am open to suggestion.